let yourself hear

My once quiet life as a hidden daughter of the Goddess seems to have imploded beneath my feet.
My calm beliefs that had basically led me no where and were not required to be a shining beacon have led me to this current path of discovery and play and knowledge and people with great wisdom coming into my life.

I think that the most important thing that I have learned so far is that you don't have to "believe" to be touched by the goddess or gods or spirits or whatever is trying to help you along.
You just have to stop for 5 seconds, quit analyzing and questioning and proving to yourself that it isn't so...just stop it.

And your intuition, the OTHER side of your brain (that we are trained not to use), your spirit, your soul, your natural connection to the universe ....will speak to you. Maybe in whispers, maybe in shouts, maybe in song, or pictures or a beautiful dream....but it will speak to you. Just be quiet and listen.

you have to let go for pathworking to work

I did a guided meditation a few evenings ago that gave me some good information.
I got to the point where sometimes I turn the meditation off and see what happens. Instead of the room that I usually visualize, there was a dark curtain that I couldn't see through or find a way around. I just waited, tried to keep my mind as clear and calm as possible and waited to see what would happen. Bast appeared again and told me to walk with her, away from the curtain. As we walked away hands reached out through the curtain, reaching for me. I asked her what was happening and she said that those were my fears...I have let them get so strong that they are controlling where I walk. I need to stop thinking about them and instead think about my goals and the good things about the work to reach these goals. We walked to a doorway and watched over a beautiful meadow for a while and then went back through the hallway, past the curtain with the hands, back up the stairs and to the end of the meditation.
Afterward I felt calm and focused and the next morning got a lot of things done that I have been putting off or obsessing over.

dithering and meditation

I have been dithering for days. Slowly working myself into the kind of panicky feeling that vibrates your entire body. Just life, accumulated problems, how things pile up, not enough sleep....all those things that try to gang up on us. I have not experienced this is a very long time.

Meditation practice keeps me grounded in a way that keeps unfounded disaster scenarios from playing over and over in my head. I used to live this way, a roller coaster ride of good and bad times....not over the edge, but sometimes unsettling. For many years now, walking this path has let me enjoy the good times and not get sucked into the bad. This time was very frustrating and I found myself questioning everything, my path, my practice....talk about letting that negative energy take over.

With some help from Ariel's meditations....love them....and a sudden awakening of a sense of the ridiculous, life is getting back on track.

I looked at people in the grocery store and watched faces that are stressed, worried, fearful, anxious, rude and wondered how many of them are just having a bad day and how many are living in that state.

Then I came home, sat down for a moment, lit some incense, lit a candle and gave heartfelt thanks to Goddess for kicking me in the ass some time ago.